


The Cask of Amontillado (But, like, w/ Stickmen)

by exoticlark



Category: THSC - Fandom, The Henry Stickmin Collection
Genre: Alternate Universe, Brief Violence, Buried Alive, Character Death, Implied/Referenced Character Death, ONLY ONE BETA WE DIE LIKE REGINALD, Reginald is a bitch, THSC AU, by brief violence i mean reg gets fuckin wacked by a shovel, reg simps avert ur eyes, technically, yea this is a parody of the cask of amontillado
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-09
Updated: 2021-03-09
Packaged: 2021-03-15 09:42:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,418
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29931546
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/exoticlark/pseuds/exoticlark
Summary: For nearly 10 years, Henry has put up with Reginald, letting him remain as his Second in Command. But when Reginald crosses the line and Henry finds out, how far will the former solo thief go to fix things?Parody of Edgar Allan Poe's "The Cask of Amontillado".
Relationships: Reginald Copperbottom/Right Hand Man
Comments: 2
Kudos: 16





	The Cask of Amontillado (But, like, w/ Stickmen)

**Author's Note:**

> b4 any of u ask "wait what the fuck there's a castle WHAT", for context: back when i was first writing this fic, there was this thing in simphat (a thsc server i'm in), where the toppat clan had a castle faction n shit ? memories r blurry but that's the general gist . used that idea here !

**A thousand injuries of Reginald I had borne best I could - but when he ventured far beyond insult, I vowed** **_revenge._ **

The only sound that reverberated through the old, dilapidated hallways of the castle were two pairs of footsteps. Silver moonlight poured through the long since shattered windows, illuminating the washed-out red carpet path. Two figures carrying flashlights made their way through the weather beaten building. The one in the lead was none other than Reginald Copperbottom, the one following after being named Henry Stickmin.

Henry pulled his cape closer around him, repressing a shiver. It was  _ cold _ tonight, which was to be expected. It was fall, and it would be winter soon. "Why are we here again?" Henry asked. Reginald turned to look at him, before smiling gently at him. "We're here to see if we left anything behind in the wine cellar. I doubt we did, but I do have a hunch that we left  _ this _ behind!"

Reginald pulled out an old-looking, vintage photograph from his coat pocket, the edges worn from age. He then handed it over to Henry, who took it and was immediately confused. In the photograph, there were two very old men standing by a barrel of wine, seeming extremely happy with themselves. On the back of the photo was cursive writing that appeared completely illegible to Henry.

"That," - Reginald continued, not looking at Henry - "Is Dusty and Cloudface! They're the oldest leaders the Toppat Clan has ever had." He turned, looking at Henry, who met his gaze. "In that photo, they purchased a cask of Amontillado." Now Henry was just _ more  _ confused. "Amontillado?" He asked, carefully stepping over a pile of rubble.

"You  _ don't  _ know what Amontillado is?!" Reginald stared at Henry in shock, who returned with a deadpan look. "I didn't grow up like how  _ you  _ did, Reginald." Reginald snorted, rolling his eyes. "Of course you didn't, you probably grew up in some dirty old neighborhood." Henry scowled, only grunting in response as his pupils narrowed.

"Well… All you need to know is that Amontillado is a very fine wine. Very,  _ very  _ fine."

* * *

An hour had passed before they finally found the wine cellar, opened the hatch, walked down the winding staircase, and began to look for the Amontillado. Henry knew it wouldn't be here - he had been one of the Toppats to head down here to bring up all of the wonderfully aged wine into the space station. But… Reginald didn't need to know that.

Reginald was just about to call it quits when Henry suddenly pointed over to a dark alcove. "Have we checked there?" Reginald looked over at the alcove skeptically. "No, I don't think so…" There was a brief moment of silence, before Henry said, "Well? What're you waiting for? Go check it out." Reginald was immediately taken aback. "Me?!" He squeaked. Henry nodded. "Yeah, you, man. You're the one who wanted to come down to this fuckin' place, so you check." Reluctantly, Reginald walked into the alcove, letting his flashlight shine on its contents.

There was no Amontillado, or  _ any  _ barrel of wine hidden within the alcove. But there were… "Chains?" Reginald whispered, deeply confused. There were chains,  _ new chains _ , bolted to the wall. Not a smidge of rust or mold growing on them. "Yup. Those are chains." Henry practically  _ hissed  _ from behind him, and Reginald spun around, ready to assault Henry with questions - only to be assaulted himself, met by a shovel striking him in the head.

_ "Ghhk-!" _

* * *

Slowly, Reginald awoke, his head throbbing and aching painfully. A distinct scraping sound seeped into his mind, and he groggily raised his head, holding it in one hand. "Ooh.. My… My head…" Reginald's blurred vision slowly cleared as he regained his bearings, managing to make out Henry's form, illuminated by a flashlight.

"Yeah, sorry about that." The Chief rasped, his voice sounding scratchy from not having spoken in a long while. "I just don't think you'd let me do this - at least without fighting me over it." As Reginald began to focus, he realized Henry wasn't wearing his cape,  _ or  _ his top hat. Both had been set aside, along with Reginald's top hat.

Henry, meanwhile, looked like a mess. His shirt was stained with sweat, and some of his hair clung to his forehead. As Reginald's head continued to clear from its pained haze, he was able to see what Henry was doing - he was laying brick and mortar, having already made 5 stacks, and was already getting started on the 6 one. "Henry, what are you… Doing…?" Reginald managed to slur, his mind still foggy.

"Well, we  _ did  _ find the Amontillado. Drank some of it, too - though it had a bit more kick than you were expecting, I think." Henry paused, taking a moment to wipe sweat off of his brow and looking at Reginald. "I've been trying to leave for some time now, but you wanna stay behind to drink some more. So, I'll just leave you down here." The Chief finished with a smile, before continuing with his work.

"But… I don't  _ want  _ to stay here!" Reginald groggily hissed, struggling to stand. It felt like there was something tight and hard coiled around his legs, but he ignored it. "Come on, let's leave-!" Reginald was finally able to stand, but was met with extreme resistance upon trying to step forward. He stumbled, before falling back down, and managed to get a good look at himself.

Chains. Chains were coiled all around his body, from his legs, all the way up to his chest. The only part of him that was free were his arms and head. The wheels in Reginald's head began to turn more quickly, and everything became shockingly clear - as did the pain in his head, and the feeling of blood trickling down his face, from where Henry had hit him with a shovel.

"There you go, Reg, I was wondering when you'd realize what I was _really_ doing, 'n when you'd realize I was lyin' to you." Came Henry's now very sinister sounding voice, and Reginald looked at him to see his smile grow wider. "But- I-I- Henry, why?" Reginald stammered, panic rising in his chest as he began to hyperventilate.

"Why?"

Henry once again stopped his work, setting down his trowel as he glared at the chained up man before him. "I've had to put up with your little insults for nearly a  _ decade  _ now, Reginald. Jabs directed towards my upbringing, who I was before becoming chief- even about my fuckin'  _ family. _ " For a moment, Reginald's panic was quelled, and he felt indignant rage swell in his chest instead.

"Oh,  _ please! _ " Reginald hissed, tugging against his chains as he glared daggers at Henry. "Those were just fucking  _ jokes! _ Hardly any reason to wall me up in a cellar and leave me to die!" Henry snorted, rolling his eyes. "Maybe those were all just playful little 'jokes' to you, but that little secret journal of yours I found hidden away in your room was  _ anything  _ but playful."

Reginald's mouth went dry, a nervous sweat beginning to form as he did his best to keep his hands from shaking. "W-What do you mean?" Reginald squeaked. "Don't play dumb." Henry growled, beginning to continue his work, starting the 7th layer. "You know  _ exactly _ what I'm talkin' about, Reginald."

There was a long, 30 second silence, punctuated only by Henry's labored breathing as he placed down brick and mortar. Finally, Reginald spoke. "When… When did you find out?" Henry responded, not looking up from his work. "About 3 days ago. You're real lucky I didn't just fucking storm up to you, right then and there, 'n kill you when I finished reading your grand plan to kill _ me. _ "

"Why  _ didn't  _ you?" Reginald tentatively asked. "Because if I did, it would'a been  _ big  _ 'n  _ dramatic _ 'n I knew you would've wanted to go out like that." Henry then let out a low chuckle. "That, 'n also 'cause I prolly would'a gotten killed myself if I did that." Reginald shifted uncomfortably in his chains, fidgeting with the incredibly tight cuffs on his wrists. "Have you… Did you tell anyone else about what you found?"

"Awh, little Reggie scared I'll spoil his already tainted reputation?" Henry let out a cruel laugh, momentarily stopping his work to make a mocking pouty face. "No, I didn't tell anyone else. I'm not airing out  _ this  _ dirty laundry to the masses - this is a problem between you and I, a problem  _ I  _ gotta fix before it can get worse." There was the briefest pause from Henry, before he looked at Reginald with genuine curiosity.

"Why Reg? Why'd you have to do that?"

Reginald casted his eyes downwards, biting his lip. "I was… Erhm… I-I was… Drunk, when I wrote all th-" Reginald's fib was cut short by a sudden chortle from Henry. "Oh yeah? You were drunk, huh?  _ That's  _ your excuse?" All Reginald did was let out a low whine, before Henry snickered and continued working, quickly finishing the 7th layer.

The panic that had been building up inside of Reginald the whole time finally exploded. " **_HELP!_ ** " He shouted, doing his best to be as loud as he could conceivably make himself be, " **_SOMEBODY HELP!!_ ** " "Nobody can hear you all the way down here." Henry responded in an exasperated tone. "By the time spring rolls around, you prolly won't even have the strength to even  _ whisper _ ."

"This isn't  _ fair  _ Henry!" Reginald hissed, breathing heavily. "Why are you  _ so  _ surprised and hurt by the fact I wanted to reclaim my throne from you after you  _ stole it  _ from me so unceremoniously?!" Henry suddenly slammed his trowel against the ground, causing a loud  _ clang _ to reverberate throughout the large wine cellar.

"Because I  _ trusted  _ you, Reginald! I thought I could trust you, and you just- you-"

"Then  _ you're  _ the idiot for ever thinking it was a good idea to trust me! And you are hardly blameless in any of this as well-!"

" **_I SAW YOU AS A FATHER FIGURE Y-you…_ ** _ You…"  _ Henry snorted in anger, pupils narrowing as tears pricked the edges of his eyes, lips bared back in a snarl that showed off every single razor-sharp tooth in his mouth. "I thought I'd finally found a place I could be cared for, where I could finally have a family 'n feel safe - and you just decided you couldn't have that!" He then chuffed, picking up the trowel. "Some second in command you are."

"It's your  _ own fault  _ for trusting me." Reginald retorted, seemingly unphased by Henry's outburst. "Tryin' to shift blame 'til the very end. Yeah, that's pretty in-character for you." Henry shook his head as he let out a heavy sigh, resuming his work. By now, he was halfway through the 8th stack.

There was yet another long pause of silence, which was broken again by Reginald. "How do you plan explaining this to the Clan, hm? To Right?!" The bratty Toppat demanded, trying - and failing - miserably to keep a steady tone. "Don't worry about that." Henry chuckled, not looking up at Reginald. "Wrote a nice  _ loooong _ letter about how you fell for a nice rich man, 'n decided to run away with him 'cause you decided you just loved him so much more than poor ol' Rightwis."

Henry finished the 8th layer, starting the 9th one. Only 1 more remained. Reginald's time was running out. "As for how Right'll handle this? Hm. I'm sure he'll be fine." Henry then chuckled lowly. "Besides, I think he 'n Wilhelm would just make the  _ cutest  _ couple, don'chu agree Reggie?" Reginald sniffed indignantly, panic beginning to surge again as he realized Henry was quickly finishing the 9th layer and about to get started on the final 10th one.

"A-alright Henry, this has gone on far enough!" Reginald stuttered, feigning laughter in his tone. "Your sense of humor is quite… Erhm… Morbid, I must admit! Come on now, let's go back to the orbital station and settle this in a  _ civil  _ manner!" Henry huffed, starting work on the final layer. "Dunno, Reg." The Chief mused. "I think we're gettin' things settled just fine like this, yeah?"

The coolness and certainty in Henry's voice, knowing he'd get away with this, that no one would know what truly happened to Reginald, that he'd successfully widow Reginald's  _ poor sweet Righty _ \- finally broke Reginald. He tried to lunge toward the wall, getting caught in his chains as they pulled painfully at his limbs. Reginald clawed desperately the ground beneath him, as a rat would in a trap.

"FOR THE LOVE OF  _ GOD,  _ HENRY!" Reginald shrieked, tears running down his face as he continued to desperately scramble. "Yes, for the love of God. For the love of loyalty." Henry calmly responded, sliding in the second to last brick into the final row. "And for the love of  _ family. _ " All that remained was one more brick, and the alcove would be sealed for - hopefully - a long time.

"Got anything you wanna say, Reggie?" Henry asked. His inquiry was only met by choked sobs and whimpers. Rolling his eyes, the Chief laid down the final bit of mortar, and slid the final brick into place.

Silence. Blissful silence.

Henry let out a deep, cathartic sigh, rubbing his brow free of sweat using his sleeve. After he rehid the remaining mortar and bricks, he reached down, putting his tophat back on before grabbing Reginald's tophat. For a moment, he wondered what to do with it - ultimately deciding to pull out a lighter and watching the hat burn until it was nothing more but a pile of ash.

As the last ember died, Henry began making his way back through the wine cellar, discarding Reginald's flashlight as he went. Nobody ever came to the old castle anymore. Nobody would ever find Reginald's body. Truthfully, Henry did feel a little bad about Right; the former Right Hand didn't deserve to ever have such a greedy, rotten husband like Reginald. Whoever Right loved next - if he ever loved again - Henry hoped they wouldn't be like Reginald.

As Henry left the wine cellar, with dawn beginning to creep through ruined windows, he felt a strange feeling of calm wash over him - as if he'd defeated some great evil. He turned, facing the dark maw of the wine cellar, now Reginald's tomb, and smiled. "Burn in hell, Copperbottom." Henry hissed, before slamming the cellar doors shut.

  
**For over 50 years, nobody has disturbed him.** **_In pace requiescat!_ **


End file.
